Frequent Visitors, Toddler Messes, Dishes, Laundry, Cooking, Cleaning, Crying, Diapers, SLEEP!
These basic realities after baby comes are pretty much universal. You know what else is universal? New moms face a lack of support and understanding from our workplaces, partners (Lord knows they do their best!), family members, and friends. We have a harmful cultural dynamic that forgets the needs of the woman in the early postpartum time and leaves parents woefully under-supported in the months following having a baby.
Yesterday I shared about how we foster a strong family bond with your newborn. But we do so much more. We help keep those external factors of life from getting out of hand.
So here’s part 2 (part 3 coming Monday!):
We help keep the crazy in check
When you arrive home from the hospital with a baby that needs so much from you, and a body that is utterly worn out from the challenges of birthing your little one, the responsibilities of keeping the home intact, keeping your other kids alive, and remembering to feed and care for yourself, are all a lot more difficult. Your newborn will wake about every 1-3 hours. But you need to rest. You just birthed a baby, after all, and your body deserves to heal.
…But life continues on around you. And there is so little time in the day for everything else when you’re recovering from birth and caring for a newborn ’round the clock.
Maybe you had great assistance from your partner for a week, and from your mom until she had to return to her responsibilities. And maybe now you’re flying solo, juggling it all on your own… and dinner from two nights ago is still splayed out on the counter, and laundry mountain grows ever taller, and it’s all feeling just a bit…crazy.
When our spaces feel out of control, we start to feel out of control.
You know that voice in the back of your head? The one saying, “Why is this so hard? I should be able to handle this!” That’s our culture speaking. That’s the barrier of pride and individualism. It stands in the way of letting you accept the help you need and deserve.
We all want to be great moms. But guys, Super Mom does not suffer through life’s difficulties until she’s forgotten herself. Super Mom does not decline support when she just needs a leg up. Super Moms are always supported from below by others.
Your postpartum doula can help. We can come by daily, for months if you need it, or we can come by just a couple of times to help you catch your breath. Or maybe what’s best for you is some overnight care so you can sleep! Or what about a short-term live-in doula until your mom arrives next week and you have the continued help you need? We can get you nutritious food on the table, a jump on the dishes and laundry that were piling up, older kids given some special time and attention, help with bedtime for the toddler (who you were hoping would be potty trained before baby came,) and then you get the time you need to nap, shower, and be refreshed for another day.
We are the practical support that helps you keep your brain on straight and your heart focused on what matters most, so internally, you are okay.
A happy mom is a better mom, and we make moms happy!
And to get a great visual of postpartum work in action, search the hashtag #postpartumdoulasdothat on your favorite social media platform. You’ll find East Texas Doulas on Instagram and No Barriers Birth on Facebook, as well as loads of other professional doulas sharing pics of their valuable postpartum support.
Does this sound like the kind of support you desire for after your baby arrives? Drop us a line!